Dear God, Dear Santa..

Sometimes i feels like i was Bella. Screaming on the middle of the night, and crying silently. I can't believe that just happened with me again. Whats going on here? I've been running and cleared my mind. Pretend, that everything's okay and trying to be kind with my self. I don't want too much complaining all the time, God. But this time, i feel soo tired of being such a 'good-liar'. I miss him all the time *sigh* Do i need more time to make things right? I'm sorry, i just lost control here. So, let me be ME on this blog. I promise, i'll be a good kids as i promise to Santa. I've learn from everything :')

Here i am, sending a letter to somebody on Christmas night. Without the name and stamp on it.



Hey! Hows everything going? I thought you are driving well. I saw you with a great smile there. Thank God you're happy:) I hope you arrive safely to your destination. I'm wishing hard to make this happend. Trying to be a Silent-Golden-Women and let some melodies unsaid. I understand your silent, because sometimes, you'll have to understand mine. Really, i want to tell you that i'm happy if you're happy. Sorry, love. I dont want to lie to myself again. I always forget to forget you. So don't think that I'm pushing you away, when you're the one that I've kept closest. The reason is i want to set you free. About anything you need and want. Wanting you happy was always more important than just wanting you. ahh, what more can i say? I'm out of words..

I promise i'll tell you when i feel that way. But not today...

Regards, Me

(well.. LIFE is not that easy, right? I never regret anything. Me and you, we are starting something. I learn from it. Like i do now, fight for bright future such as being Romusha. ehhe, i needs money for my needs. Wish me luck, then..)

So, this is My Christmas. A little bit moody but it's okay :) I believe in God's plan. God bless you always, all ways.. By the way, whatsup with you? I hope we can always develop from negative things. *cheers! HAPPY MERRY CHRISTMAS, everyone.